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The FDA currently permits seven artificial colorings to be used in food. Among them are Blue #1 and #2, and Red #3 and #40. Apparently blue is safe, but 38 out of 40 shades of red are poisonous.
“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.”
Create a website/Facebook application that allows you to say when you are “bored” and post your location. When someone else is bored (in your area), you will be notified via text message.
Do you have to be drunk to be belligerent?
I always loved to watch a teacher get observed by a supervisor while they were teaching. The new ones would squirm under pressure. Also, it was a great opportunity to get back at the teachers that you didn’t like.
“Thoughts in music and language often depend on the quality of pen and paper.”
TO DO: Compose “The Toilet Symphony,” which consists of three (bowel) movements.
She gets her period on the 1st of every month. She’s very punctual.
I went to a concert the other day and the venue marked two black x’s on my hands to indicate that I’m not old enough to purchase alcohol. That was probably the first time in my life that I thought “Damn, I wish I didn’t have hands.” Captain Hook must have had a pretty crazy adolescence.
Snoop Dogg’s birth name is Cordozar Calvin Broadus. His parent’s nicknamed him Snoopy when he was a kid.
Her eyes, as blue as what a better simile would compare her eyes to.
Why do glasses make people look smart? Is vision negatively correlated with intelligence?
Many music artists currently choose to utilize new technology to stay connected with their fans (e.g. Twitter). Sometimes this takes away from the mysterious nature of their music. I don't want to know that Thom Yorke is going to the dentist.
“It feels weird to use others’ moment of worship as a moment of nostalgia.”
An alcoholic person is less fun than an alcoholic drink.
Why aren’t more cars stolen from car dealerships? They leave hundreds of brand new cars sitting outside overnight. And it isn’t because of security. Sure, most dealerships have security cameras, but they are seldom monitored 24/7.
Google and Facebook are the new Carnegie and Rockefeller.
One of the Wachowski Brothers (Matrix directors) had a sex change. They now go by the Wachowski Siblings. Not quite as catchy.
Why are train conductors necessary?
Prank: Put fake parking tickets on people’s windshields.
When you apply for a gun they ask if it’s for hunting or protection. That’s like asking if you’re gonna shoot animals or people.
Soon VH1 will air “I Love the 00s.” After that, they plan to predict the future and create an “I Love the 10s.” Pretty soon, they will have to specify which century they are talking about.
Kim Jong-Il was once the single largest purchaser of Hennessy.
“Peace, baby, is hard to sell.”
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"Haiku" is the correct pluralization of haiku.
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